Ramblings from poopsandwich

Judge declares college QB's offense as minor

2010-03-13T06:12:00.006-06:00

Masoli's offense deemed "minor" by judge in spite of throwing for over 2K yards last season

A judge this week declared that Jeremiah Masoli's offense is minor. His stats clearly indicate otherwise, but I'm not in charge. But even though his offense was deemed minor, (in spite of passing for over 2,000 yards and rushing for 668 yards) it got his recent crime demoted from a felony to a misdemeanor. Masoli, obviously a music lover, stole 2 laptops and a guitar from a frat house on campus. Imagine how easy he would have gotten off if his offense had been better...

After the loss to Boise State in the season's first game, Oregon went on to win the PAC-10 championship. Mostly from the work of Masoli, now suspended for the 2010 season, and also from the work of LaMichael James, who rushed for over 1,500 yards, a PAC-10 freshman record. James was suspended for the opening game of the season. His crime was much less serious than Masoli's crime. James merely beat and choked his girlfriend.

LaMichael James - choker

Kudo's to Oregon coach Chip Kelly for meting out such strong punishment to two star players. This could only have been made possible by the recent signing of Temple, Texas running back, Lache Seastrunk. I think we can only hope that this doesn't become a string of renegade chokings by running backs from Texas.

Its almost time for baseball again!!

2010-01-28T10:14:00.003-06:00

The countdown has begun. February 18th is the day pitchers and catchers report to camp.

Even spacemen love baseball.

Major League Baseball's page of important dates is right here.

Humor heals all - how about some Tiger jokes?

2009-12-02T09:38:00.007-06:00

Before the jokes, this story broke overnight. This is NOT one of the jokes, it actually happened.

Tiger's request to a former "friend" to remove her name from her cell phone, cuz his "wife may have found" her number, raised some eyebrows. You can hear Tiger's voicemail here.

Tiger finally speaks, it is here.

And, now for the jokes:

Apparently the police asked Tiger’s wife how many times she hit him. She said “I don’t know exactly, but put me down for a 5.”

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole-in-one.

What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

What was Elin doing out at 2.30 in the morning? Clubbing

Why did Tiger crashed into a fire hydrant AND a tree? He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.

Why did Phil Mickelson call Elin yesterday? To pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.

What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole? Ask Tiger, he knows.

Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn’t fare very well on the driveway. Rock me.

Whats the difference between a golf ball and a caddy? Tiger can drive a golf ball.

Dog lovers say, "you boned her" and "I didn't bone him." No comment from the actual dogs involved

2009-12-01T14:30:00.005-06:00

Tiger and his lovely bride apparently had a bit of a argument, during which Elen hit Tiger in the head with a golf club. After confronting Tiger with the latest of many rumors of his whoremongering, and his subsequent denial, Elen put her four iron in the rough (aka, the back of Tiger's head).

Tiger and his lovely bride enjoy a little heavy petting

The alleged mistress, Rachel Uchitel, swears she never saw his "putter" but did get to see him do some "driving." While much speculation abounds, I think we all know what she meant by "his putter." Don't we? Yes, we do.

Rachel, also a dog lover, insists she did nothing inappropriate
(why do none of the women I know wear high heels with their cutoffs?
I feel very cheated...)

What can we learn from this situation? Tiger's wife and girlfriend are pretty hot. Oh, and if you are gonna go in the rough, you may need a pitching wedge.

As a side note, Rachel has kept the dog theme and has hired Gloria Allred as her attorney for, possibly suing the National Enquirerer and TMZ for defamation of character. She claims that she will no longer be able to have sex with celebrities, cuz they will be, like, afraid to bone her now.

Disclaimer: No bitches were harmed in the making of this post.

Guy goes to jail for shooting himself. Really.

2009-08-20T14:28:00.003-05:00

"No, really, I shot 'myself' with my own gun..."

What the hell has this world come to when a guy goes to jail for shooting himself?

This just plain crazy...

2009-07-07T15:19:00.005-05:00

Well its been a very long time since my last post. I am still alive, but as shown in the picture below, I have been very despondent and obsessed with plastic. But on the bright side, I have some new killer boots!

My new boots are awesome!!

Me and my buddy at my Downsville, TX mansion

Hope you're having a kick-ass summer!!

Baylor Men's Basketball in Big 12 Championship

2009-03-14T10:17:00.005-05:00

Lace Dunn and Henry Dugat have been shooting the lights out in OK City at the Big 12 tourney.

After upsetting the #1 seed Kansas, the Bears then beat Texas after losing to them 24 straight times. Thats 2 dozen times. Thats a beer for every loss, until you get to a case. Thats three times the John & Kate plus 8 kids. Thats 1.3 times the Duggar kids.

So the Bears play the Mizzo Tigers tonight for a chance to return to the Big Dance. If Baylor wins tonight, it would be the second consequtive year for them to make it to the Big Dance. So lift your glass, and say a toast to the Green & Gold today. And say a prayer of thanks for Drew letting Lace go berserk in OKC.

The Tigers are the higher seed, but we all know God loves Green & Gold. So here's to hoping God throws the game for us tonight.

Sic'em Bears!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-03-07T23:03:00.004-06:00

President Hussein Obama

The president announced his intention to attempt to negotiate with terrorists on Saturday. This is just another in a long line of action by Obama to reverse Bush policies and standards. Although he may not realize that that particular policy has been in effect for several decades.

====================UPDATE================================

The Taliban today responded to Obama's noted announcement that he wanted to negotiate with the Taliban "moderates."

The article said, "Afghanistan's Taliban on Tuesday turned down as illogical U.S. President Barack Obama's bid to reach out to moderate elements of the insurgents, saying the exit of foreign troops was the only solution for ending the war."

"This does not require any response or reaction for this is illogical," Qari Mohammad Yousuf, a purported spokesman for the insurgent group, told Reuters when asked if its top leader Mullah Mohammad Omar would make any comment about Obama's proposal.

"The Taliban are united, have one leader, one aim, one policy...I do not know why they are talking about moderate Taliban and what it means?"

And while they talk like Aggies, you get the gist. It turns out the Taliban thought Obama's idea was stupid too.

When asked about his thoughts on the Taliban response, Obama responded, "shut the hell up cracker!"

Lost fishermen are given up on by Coast Guard

2009-03-03T16:32:00.005-06:00

Nick Schuyler sits on the Capsized Boat in Gulf of Mexico
He was the only one found

The Coast Guard has called off the search for the missing fishermen. It must be very hard for the families of these men. At dark tonight, the search will be stopped. Coast Guard spokesman Timothy Close told reporters today, "We're extremely confident that if there are any survivors on the surface of the water that we would have found them."

A life jacket and ice chest were found appx 16 miles away from where the boat capsized. Please say a prayer for the 3 men not found and their families today.

Coast Guard must carry their hats to press conferences

The Bachelor finale gets crazy(er).

2009-03-03T15:00:00.003-06:00

The Bachelor finale gets crazy(er).

"The Crying Turd," aka Jason Mesnick

During the finale of The Bachelor, the crying turd changed his mind and went with who he believed might be the love of his life. Forget Melissa, Poor Molly...

The girl is better off without this crybaby turd, who will likely change his mind in a couple more weeks. My wife's first comment was, "forget him you dummy, he's gonna leave you too!" Get yourself a REAL MAN who doesn't cry when he has a tough decision to make. I have a couple of friends I could introduce her to.

One is a brick-layer type. Tough, construction worker who I am pretty sure has never cried. The guy I affectionately refer to as "pervert" knows how to be a man. He can drive a tractor, has killed animals with guns, loves to drink beer and fart, and would be stupid in love with such a hottie. She could be assured of no crying.

The other plays pro ball. Lots of money, not "that smart" but is very generous, has a huge manly appendage, and could literally tear another man's head off if some guy was discourteous in any way. Once again, no crying.

When asked about the Crying Turd's antics on this season of The Bachelor, Michelle Obama commented, "eff that cracker!"

The President LOVES to cuss

2009-02-18T17:51:00.002-06:00

The President has a VERY DIRTY MOUTH!!!!

Click the link above to see what I mean.

John Lovett hired as D coordinator at University of Miami

2009-02-17T18:07:00.004-06:00

John Lovit(z)

John Lovett was hired as the defensive coordinator at the University of Miami. He was previously the D coordinator at North Carolina. The word on the street is that this will in no way affect John's stale comedic career.

Religion of Peace, My Ass

2009-02-17T14:28:00.003-06:00

Muslim Praying (trying to hold fart)

The "religion of peace" is in the news again, thanks to the founder of a muslim TV station.

Muzzammil Hassan is in big trouble for beheading his wife. Apparently, he didn't know you couldn't do that in New York City. Hassan was quoted as saying, "We is marryed for lipfe. De bitch was diborching me, so I waxed herd haid off. Das de way we roll ass Muslim. You must reliss me, or you iss raysism."

From the website: "Muzzammil Hassan, who founded Bridges TV in November 2004 to counter anti-Islam stereotypes, surrendered to police Thursday. Hassan touted the network as the "first-ever full-time home for American Muslims," according to a press release."

When asked for a response, President Hussein Obama said, "shut the hell up cracker!"

2009-02-11T22:52:00.003-06:00

George Anthony weeps during memorial service for Caylee

A memorial service for little Caylee Anthony was held this week. It was a very emotional service, celebrating the very short life of an extraordinarily adorable little girl. The grandparents of Caylee weeped openly, and were overcome several times during the service.

Little Caylee was murdered by her mother several months ago, and her body was found near her home.

Cindy Anthony, Caylee's grandmother, spoke about her sorry-ass murdering daughter by saying, "She (Caylee) got your beauty and your compassion, and she got your spirit."

I'm sorry, did you say "compassion?" This lady has obviously lost it due to her grief. Beating your child to death is NOT compassionate. Hiding your child's dead body, that you just killed in a plastic bag in a water-filled ditch is NOT compassion.

I hope the family finds peace during this time. I hope that Caylee's mom Casey gets her just punishment if indeed she murdered her own child in this manner. I hope that no other child has to endure what it appears this mother did to her own child. I hope.

Old-timey snowmobile

2009-02-09T10:23:00.004-06:00

Sorry, but I cannot get a pic on of this thing, so here is something completely unrelated.

Little Turd kills a big deer - 41 points worth

This is a great video of a very early snowmobile. The video is a little long, but hey, you don't have to watch it all. You must see this thing. Movie from Liveleak, originally from Michigan or Minnesota.

Michelle Obama will not make the same mistakes Hillary Clinton made

2009-02-06T23:26:00.008-06:00

Michelle Obama, throwin' the deuce, with emphasis on the nipple

Michelle will NOT make the same mistakes Hillary made as first lady. For instance, if Barack Hussein Obama cheats on her, she has publicly stated that she will, "castrate that MF'er my damn self!!" I ain't nobody's bitch!!"

And I don't give a damn about that picture in front of the flag, I still am ashamed to be an American! Ain't no amount of damn posturing by some cracker White House aides can change that!" This after some media members asking Mrs. Barack Hussein Obama about her comment made while addressing a group in a Milwaukee audience in February of 2008, during which Michelle Obama said, “For the first time in my adult lifetime I am really proud of my
country."

Democrats across the nation have applauded her decision, and Senator Daschle has decided to show his support by not paying his taxes again next year.

President Hussein Obama responded to his wife's comments: click here

The first lady, when asked about her earlier comments responded, "shut the hell up cracker!"

Obamas show their passion for children this week

2009-02-04T19:11:00.004-06:00

The Obamas surprised a school this week by visiting them and having an impromptu question and answer session. The kids were excited to have the president and first lady in their school. It was a great opportunity for the Obamas to show they care about kids.

Michelle Obama says, "shut the hell up cracker!"

The questions ranged from the cute to the obvious.

Rasheed: "Do you like being president?"

El Presedente`: "I like all the power and stuff. Its cool."

El Presedente`: "Does anyone know why they call my office the "Oval Office?"

Julio: "Cause its occupied by a zero?"

[end of question and answer session]

editor's note: Julio is now residing in Costa Rica again after his parents were deported. Senator Daschle is expected to find a replacement house keeper very soon. If you know someone, please email the senator.

The Notorious B.I.G. Movie - "Greatest Movie Event of Our Generation" (really?)

2008-12-22T17:51:00.005-06:00

You have to see the new movie according to its publicist. I have to admit, it took me by surprise to learn that this movie is "the greatest movie event of our generation."

See the trailer here.

According to its publicist, it is THE premier movie of our generation.

Gone With the Wind - Rubbish

The Wizard of Oz - Pure Trash

Saving Private Ryan - Who cares

Dances With Wolves - Line your bird cage with that crap

Apocalypse Now, Casablanca, Schindler's List? - Drivel

The Science Behind Sexual Attraction

2008-10-09T16:22:00.003-05:00

Ever wonder why people are attracted to certain people? Really? Yeah, this chick was too.

Its a really interesting read, and I thought you might enjoy.

It's all starting to make sense now. My wife had DD's when we married, and for many years until some jackass named Atkins put an end to that.

NOBAMA IN 2008!!!!

2008-09-25T14:44:00.006-05:00

My New Slogan

I try to be non-partisan when it comes to politics. As a Christian, I feel that I should weigh the issues and not play to the political sway from both parties. As a matter of fact, I feel that all politicians are big fat liars anyway. So I research and try to find one that supports issues I support.

It snuck up on me this year. I didn't have time to research much, but McCain seemed too closely tied to Bush, and I felt it was time for change. My friends told me, but I voted for him anyway. In the primary, I voted for Obama.

Another factor influenced me too. My sweet mother, God bless her, raised us to be color-blind, and to respect the influence of Martin Luther King Jr and the civil rights leaders of the 1960's. So, because he is black (well, kind of arab, white and black, but you know, at least part black) I jumped on the bandwagon. It would be great for our nation to have a president that has black in his heritage. It would show how far we have come as a nation in our quest for equality.

But his incredible shrinking head has become more and more visible. It is quickly becoming more apparent that he is in fact an empty suit. Maybe I was wrong. Sorry, I WAS wrong.

I have jumped ship. And I now support the hot librarian and the old guy.

The Very Hot Sarah Palin

If she makes it into office, she will be by far the best looking person ever in office. And I personally would love to see her in the news, as opposed to anyone else currently running.

I recently saw this website and thought you all might like to see it. Funny stuff over there.

You need to see this website:

http://www.nobama.com/?gclid=CIe62a7Z95UCFR-mQQodowqV4Q

Good luck in choosing your political candidate this year. But for me, Obama can "keep the change."

Sheriff's Department Cannot Operate a Fax Machine

2008-08-11T16:24:00.004-05:00

Seal of Brazoria County, "Where Texas Began"

This is a true story. None of the facts have been changed, because of the stupity of the situation.

Recently while on vacation, I was ticketed for no insurance. It was in a car I rarely drive, and the ticket was promptly placed into the glove box and forgotten. Until this weekend.

I received a call from the Brazoria County Sherrif's office informing me of a warrant for my arrest for non-payment of the ticket. As it turns out, I just needed to show them my insurance card, which was not in the car, because I only drive that 4-wheel drive to the coast. Which also explains why I never saw it again. It hasn't moved since we returned from the coast.

So this morning, I attempted to fax my insurance card to the Sherriff's Department to resolve the issue. I faxed it and called. Not there. An hour later, i faxed it again. Not there.

At the risk of sounding like an ass, I requested that the clerk verify the fax machine had paper in it. It did. However, the toner cartridge is out. She didn't know how to change it, and even she did, she didn't know where they were kept. No shitting.

Our resolution, tomorrow, the "city lady" will be in (she only works a half day, no shitting) and she know how to change the toner cartridge. She will then print the fax, adjust the ticket, and see if I owe anything at that point. In the meantime, I should "try to not get stopped" or I might go to jail.

No shitting.

Two of Brazoria County's Finest, not the one who gave me the ticket

Chinese People Eat Weird Stuff

2008-08-07T10:23:00.004-05:00

This is what a chinese person looks like

This guy has a strange new diet. I have heard of strange things being eaten by chinese people: rats, dogs and other things. But a canadian? WTH?

Morgan Freeman in Serious Car Accident

2008-08-04T11:16:00.003-05:00

The Great Morgan Freeman

So Morgan Freeman was involved in a serious car accident this weekend. At the time of this writing he is in serious condition in the hospital.

This academy award winning actor has been a favorite of mine for many years. His fine work includes: Million Dollar Baby, Seven, Driving Miss Daisy, The Bucket List, Bruce Almighty, Evan Almighty, Amistad, Nurse Betty and tons more movies. Not the least of which was his role as the narrator of the wildly popular film, March of the Penguins.

This blog wishes Mr. Freeman Godspeed in his recovery.

This blog also wants to know, "what the hell you doin' driving a 1997 Maxima?"

Well?

The nursing double standard - tit for Tad

2008-07-31T09:29:00.005-05:00

Golden Retriever Nurses Tigers

So at a Kansas zoo, a golden retriever has adopted tiger cubs, and is nursing them. Its such a heart-warming story that makes everyone go, "awwwwwwweeee." How cute!!

But there are questions that come to mind:

Will the tigers bark or growl?

Will the males now lift their leg when they pee?

Inquiring minds need to know.

Another story talks about a new trend in breastfeeding. It seems some moms have started "cross-feeding" their kids. That means Susan is now breastfeeding Janet's baby, and vice-versa.

A mom breastfeeding someone else's baby (click for the story) seems gross to some.

Is it a double standard? Should mommy boobies be reserved only for their own babies? Some argue its a natural progression in breastfeeding. Others would say its just icky.

What say you?? <-- your invitation to comment

2008-07-09T09:44:00.001-05:00

Just a reminder that hunting season is right around the corner.

Sorry, I've been busy...

2008-07-03T15:50:00.003-05:00

Its certainly good to be back (I love talking to myself).

I have been in hiding, and could not untie my hands in order to post.

Happy 4th of July.

Funny Blog

2008-04-12T17:44:00.005-05:00

This guy really hits the nail on the head. And since I am beyond buried in tax season, and have had all my creativeness sucked right out of my brain, a little tidbit for you.

This will be really funny to some of you, and for those who it is not funny to, please go to church sometime. Then this stuff will also make you laugh.

Funny Site Link Here.

Please notice I made no mention of my incorrect prediction of the Kansas NCAA win. Let's face it pics of squids are funnier.

Basketball

2008-04-06T20:02:00.005-05:00

Coach Calipari

Kansas v Memphis

In spite of Digger (boogers?) Phelps insistence that Memphis' inability to hit a free throw would remove them from the NCAA tourney. They made it into the final four, and are now in the championship game. While Calipari defended his boys by saying "they would hit the free throws when it mattered."

I thought he was full of crap. But while they have hit a paltry .613 for the season, they hit 20 of 23 against UCLA. Pretty salty.

And while they have a coach whose name sounds more like an appetizer at Macaroni Grill, you have to respect a guy who has gotten what he has out of a team from a second tier conference. Get your scissors ready Memphis.

Gratitude...

2008-03-22T16:34:00.004-05:00

Well, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself last night and this morning. My Gentlemen Bears were ousted in the first round of the NCAA Tourney. I spent 3 hours in the dentist chair yesterday afternoon, (lovely way to spend a Friday afternoon) and my mouth is extremely sore.

Then today, I found out a couple things that have helped me have a little perspective.

A friend was riding his kids scooter last night. He now has a broken arm related to said scooter adventure.

But the worst I just found out. My daughter's best friend has a dad that is really into motorcycles. Last night while riding, he was hit by a car and had his leg severed. As in crushed, and fell off. Think lots of blood here. If you are the praying type, say a few for him please.

As for me, I have nothing to whine about. A couple Alleve will cure all my ills today, and I have no casts, and all my limbs. I am thankful.

Happy Easter!!!

Sic'em Gentleman Bears!!!

2008-03-09T22:30:00.004-05:00

Lace Dunn spoils Sand Pirate "Senior Day"

Well Lace Dunn cooked up 38 points against the Sand Pirates Saturday. He was a man on a mission. And although he failed to meet my prediction for his point scoring, he was a man possessed. In scoring 38, he broke a Baylor freshman single game scoring record, and poised himself for a great NCAA tourney. Its the first time a Baylor player has scored that many points since 1988. Yes, I said 1988.

I had predicted that he would break the career points record in a single season. He did not. Although, technically he broke his own career record. Yeah me!

Look for the Bears to make it to the NCAA tourney on selection day.

Roll the Dice!!

2008-03-04T17:09:00.001-06:00

Happy Tuesday!

RIP - Larry Norman

2008-02-28T07:15:00.005-06:00

The Great Larry Norman

UPDATE - Yesterday while reading an interview Larry did, I read where he wrote the song, Why Don't you Look Into Jesus about Janis Joplin. His group People were performing a concert, and Janis was standing behind the curtain with a bottle of Southern Comfort in one hand, and a paper cup in the other. He was moved to write the song:

Sipping whiskey from a paper cup,
You drown your sorrows till you can't get up,
Take a look at what you've done to yourself,
Why don't you put the bottle back on she shelf,
Yellow fingers from your cigarettes,
Your hands are shaking while your body sweats,
Why don't you look into Jesus, He's got the answer

Don't go into shock, I am posting two days in a row. It is with great sadness that I must report one of my heroes, The Father of Christian Rock Music, Larry Norman has passed from this earth. His funeral was March 1st near Salem, Oregon.

When I was a radical Christian teenager, I loved Larry's no-compromise lyrics, and rockin' out tunes. I had never heard anything like it. From Why Should the Devil Have all the Good Music, to I Wish We'd All Been Ready he made music that sounded sort of like the Stones and Bob Dylan had a collision. Perhaps my favorite song, the Rock That Doesn't Roll depicted all that was great about Larry Norman's music. Larry was the originator of the "one way" hand signal, the index finger pointing upwards. The guy was a geniune pioneer.

He ended his life much like he lived it. He was writing music and trying to make an impact right up to the end. He also was pretty much shunning the spotlight, and music companies right to the end. In spite of his refusal to follow along with the main stream music companies, his ministry grew.

Excerpt from an interview with Contemporary Christian Music Magazine (CCM):

CCM: "What then was your view of the church?"

NORMAN: "I had no time for the church matrix. I didn’t think you needed a majority vote from the elders on the board to undertake a musical ministry. The churches weren’t going to accept me looking like a street person with long hair and faded jeans. They did not like the music I was recording. And I had no desire to preach the gospel to the converted. I wanted to be out on the sidewalk preaching to the runaways and the druggies and the prostitutes.

When non-believers used to criticize the church I would say, "Yeah, I agree and I think that God is disappointed in what people have done with Jesus." And then I would go on to talk about what Christ personally said and did. It worked. I wasn’t there to argue against people’s beliefs. I was there to talk about what God’s truth is."

Larry wrote a post at his blog shortly before his death. In that post he stated, I feel like a prize in a box of cracker jacks with God's hand reaching down to pick me up. I have been under medical care for months. My wounds are getting bigger. I have trouble breathing. I am ready to fly home. He was gracious in life, even at the end. This is a guy who gets it.

You can read more about Larry at his website, http://www.larrynorman.com/ (that there is a link).

You can also order his music there. I would suggest you start with In Another Land or The Best of Larry Norman, Vol I

Rest in Peace Larry, you will be missed.

Baylor Softball Rocks!!

2008-02-27T10:47:00.005-06:00

Baylor women score again!

Baylor Softball is off to another great start, and my girls could not be happier. After losing 3 great players, maybe the best pitcher the team has ever had in the great Lisa Ferguson, some felt they might have a down year. But Coach Moore has the team on a roll with some very young players. This in spite of losing Ashley Monceaux, a College World Series all-tourney player, and Chelsi Lake.

Britney Turner has really come up big this year, showing shades of the greatness we all suspected. And Ms. Isham looks like she will be a force to be dealt with this season. Of course, Shortridge should continue to be power on the mound, as well as the plate. There are several new players that appear to be contributing already.

Jordan Daniels hit .643 (9-for-14) with two doubles, three home runs and seven RBI in Baylor's four games this past weekend. We may have to start calling her "Hammer" if she keeps spanking the ball like she is. Congrats on her Big 12 Player of the Week honors.

Sic' Em Lady Bears!!

Smart Ass 8th Grader

2008-02-22T10:54:00.005-06:00

Hero of Child Molestors Everywhere

For a 13 year old, this is major genius. He put up a myspace page about his principal, with some, lets say unflattering rhetoric. So the school suspends the kid, and now his parents are sueing.

According to the Myspace page (now deleted), the principal enjoys "giving students anal... and jacking off in my office..." In addition, the principal's heroes are Michael Jackson, Hitler and Sadaam Hussein and his "purple penetrator." And, he loves "gay movies." His other interest include, uh, copulating with the assistant principal.

Jackson with his next victim

Hillary Clinton Showing how Deep Her Allegiance Runs, YYEEEESSSS!!!!

2008-02-18T18:40:00.006-06:00

Weeeellllllll. It was only a matter of time before the truth came out. Based on her views on gun control and other issues, I suspected Billary Clinton had a secret agenda. In fact, many have accused her of having a secret agenda of bringing America to its knees. No matter what your opinion of her, I think everyone agrees on the fact that she is a major crazy bitch.

Below, see Billary pledging her allegiance to Hitler. Her gun control policies fit right in with his. You know its bad when the Klan decides to support Obama so Hillary doesn't make it to the White House. They usually like the whole Hitler, Arian thing - so you know she is bad news.

Hillary giving Hitler Salute

Meanwhile, a half a world away, Marines pray for one of their own. And that Billary does not make it to the White House. Reality. These guys are dieing to protect the very laws and rights that Billary wants to take away from every American.

Hope you enjoyed your freedom today

I predict Billary gets elected when this happens:

Hell Freezes Over

Turdpolishers.Com Coo Performed

2008-02-13T19:39:00.006-06:00

Really horrible pic of my screenshot, sorry I will try for a better one.

One of my bad habits is to frequent Turdpolishers.com, aka, BaylorFans.com.

Its an eclectic group of neer-do-wells and kool-aid drinking fans of the B. They get in pissing matches frequently, and generally seek to become the most self-important, intolerant person on the board. While there are exceptions, such as Pale Rider, Simp13, Wooldog and a few others, this is the general rule.

Well, on a particular Saturday afternoon recently, while a B basketball game was in full swing, I logged onto the board. While my intentions were to just check it out and weigh in with my opinions, it turned ugly. Not ugly in a "I'm an internet tough-guy" kind of way. But ugly in a "there's no one else on this frickin board" kind of way.

After about 45 minutes of posting, I noticed that I had the last post on about half of every thread listed. So it began. In approximately and hour and 25 minutes I was the latest poster on EVERY thread on the board. Legends are born of this sort of thing interpeeps.

Now one might ask, how does one do this? Post at 4 am? Perhaps. Do you jam the board with mind control and overtake every possible poster? Perhaps. But in my case, I just started shooting off my mouth, which I must admit, I tend to do alot of. But as you will notice in the screen shot above, (ok, you really can't see it,) it occured in the middle of a Saturday afternoon.

And a legend is born...

Sports Briefs

2008-02-05T10:39:00.000-06:00

Today's Sports Briefs

This just in: Last night in Highland Park a women's step class turned ugly when the women, who were on a 3 day retreat all had simultaneous gas expulsion. Authorities say the women had all swallowed bubble gum as part of a bonding class in an exercise of overcoming the fear of swallowing. Unfortunately, the lunch that day included generous portions of baked beans and cabbage. The picture below shows what happened.

What can happen when you swallow your gum

In college basketball news:

Bobby Knight resigns at Texas Tech. He told people, "...I'm old, and I'm just tired..." which may be code for another salad bar incident rumored to have taken place at the 50 Yard Line Restuarant. No matter what your feelings are towards Bob, he is a legend in college basketball. He will be missed. Maybe some other A-hole will emerge to provide us with shocking moments.

Thanks to our Friends at LandThieves.Com

One of Life's Most Embarassing Moments (for me)...

2008-01-26T11:19:00.000-06:00

The end of the Baylor Master Tax Program was drawing to an end for me. Everyone was interviewing. I myself had several arranged. So my dear mother bought me a new suit to interview in, which was not only greatly appeciated, but desperately needed.

To say my clothes were not interview appropriate is an understatement. Granted, Baylor Homecoming sweatshirts, and Diadeloso t-shirts were great, but not your standard fare for the professional environment. Plus, I had gained around 40 pounds, so none of my old suits fit anymore. So off we went to Goldstein-Miguel's (how many of you remember that place?).

At the time I was working almost full-time and also attending the tax program full-time. Were it not for my wife, it would have been impossible to pull off. She was a tremendous blessing in my life and I love her dearly for all she did for me. One of those things she did for me, was to ready my suit for a big interview.

For you B business alums, you know that prior to the Enron debacle, Arthur Anderson Acccounting firm was "THEE" place to go to work. They took only the brightest and the best, so it was said. And to get a job there validated your existence on earth and confirmed your worthiness to enter heaven. From the moment we walked into the Arthur Anderson Student Center on the Baylor campus, we all knew it was the place to go. And if you were not hired by them, well, you should immediately stop your subscription to breathing air.

The God of Accounting in the 90's

So it was to be one of my busiest days in months. Two exams to take, three bids to submit at work (I was a construction estimator) and my big interview with the Tax Partner with Arthur Anderson. I was elated to get this interview, because I missed the sign-up and all of the interview slots were taken. Due to my excellent schmoozing skills I was able to obtain a 10 minute interview with the guy.

My schedule that day:

8:30am - submit bid #1

10:00am - Tax Practice & Procedures exam

12:30pm - submit bid #2

12:50pm - Interview with Arthur Anderson

1:10pm - Estate and Gift Tax exam

4:15pm - submit bid #3

So after bid #1 I picked up the suit from the tailor, and took it home so Mrs Poop could ready it for me to wear. "Make sure you take all the tags off for me!!" was the last thing I said as I slammed the door on the way to my 10am exam.

This day from the depths of hell allowed me about 20 minutes to go home, throw on the suit and get to the campus in time for the big interview. I made sure he knew how appreciative I was of him cutting his lunch short for a quick interview. My 10 minute interview went for about 4 minutes. I was not only confused, but devastated. No chance in hell I get a job after a 4 minute interview. With no AA job my life was now over, and any other job was an embarassment to the B.

I said all the right things, had an awesome resume, and just like Ryan Leaf, I looked good on paper and had great referrals. Why did he have that smug look on his face? Why did he cut the interview so short? I wondered this all the way to the restroom after the interview. No time now to worry, I had a big exam.

As I walked into class, everyone looked at me and smiled. "They like my new suit!" I thought to myself. "Too bad I'm married girls" I thought proudly. About then, my buddy "Bob" says to me, "Get a new suit?" Grinning from ear to ear, he holds out his arm and waves his hand under his arm like something was dangling there. What the...

As it turns out, the ONLY tag my damned sorry-ass wife removed was the BIG, GIANT, tag on the very front of the suit that said, "10% OFF." Yessir, I had the tag on the sleeve, which could only be seen by me looking in the mirror in the bathroom with my arm up to my face. At that point, I could also see the somewhat large tag hanging from the armpit of the coat. At that point, I prayed for the earth to open up and swallow me whole.

Like this suit, only with big-ass tags

If you look in a thesaurus for the word "humiliated" you will see: shamed, mortified, disgraced, embarrassed, dishonored. I'm not sure all of those words together can convey how I felt at that very moment. It was the single-most embarassing moment in my entire life. Worse than my mom finding my "reading material" and way worse than when I came home drunk and had my car taken away for a month by my dad after I puked on his feet. This day, I would likely never forget. And I was pretty sure my classmates would always remember me as "the guy with all the tags on his suit." I must admit. I sat in a stall and cried a bit. As if I didn't have enough stress in my life with working full-time and going to school full-time, I had this to deal with.

At that moment, everything good I had done vanished, and only my blown interview and ticker-tape suit existed. How I passed that test I will never know. I had lost my ability to concentrate.

Well, we all know now what happened with Arthur Anderson and Enron. So I guess they have more to be embarassed about than me. Payback's a bitch. NA NA NA NAA NA. (yeah, I know they had the conviction overturned)

It all worked out. I went to work for a great small firm in the Dallas area with some amazing clientele. I did tax work for some very high-profile people for years, and was exposed to some the most cutting edge tax planning by the best law firms in the Dallas area. I got to see from the inside-out the big-picture of how it all worked and flowed from one entity to another. It turned out to be one of the best things to ever happen to me.

Now, I have my own CPA firm, and do for my clients and introduce them to what I learned from the big tax attorneys I used to work with. I get to work with professional athletes, meet people I never dreamed I would and be a part of some very cool stuff. It has proved to me that God is bigger than me, and maybe, just maybe, he is gonna take good care of me, in spite of me. Boy, am I glad I didn't cancel my subscription to air. Oh yeah, I also learned to never depend on your wife if its really important.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Gentleman Bears Win a Big One

2008-01-24T16:18:00.000-06:00

WOW!! And did I say WOW!!

The mighty Gentleman Bears of the B scored a major victory last night at Cash Machine U (ATM for the uninformed).

The Bears fought through FIVE, that's FIVE overtimes to secure the win. With half the team fouled out, everyone got in the on the action.

Cash Machine U has decided to cancel the remainder of its season and spend its efforts trying to convice Billy G to come back. They have appropriated funds from Coach Fran's website to cover the cost of the Kentucky buyout. Kentucky has demanded four sets of false tooth and 149 cases of Rebel Yell.

Yessir, I said 5 Overtimes!

Coach Drew pulled a major upset over the 10th ranked Agrics to take the first meeting with the teams both being ranked in 93 years! Yaawwwwwsaaaa!

Congrats to Coach Drew and the Gentlemen Bears. I take back all those times when I made fun of our now dear coach. OK, not all of them.

Coach Drew giving out Man-Love

The players were exhausted after the big game, and just wanted to shower and get back to Waco were they will accept thier status as Demi-Gods.

Lacedarius Dunn wishing for a little privacy after the game

Congrats to the mighty Gentlemen Bears!

PS - be sure to vote in the current poll

Doom, Despair! and Agony on me!

2008-01-21T13:43:00.000-06:00

Did you enjoy those 5 Super Bowl Trophies?

I hope you did! I hope you did!

Its more than just a HeeHaw line. The depression and gloom that hit cowboys fans everywhere was very real. We like us some winnin', and we don't like it when we ain't winnin', especially when we dun wun 13 games in the same year.

Literal depiction of the figurative NFL football storm currently brewing

After my beloved Cowboys lost, I had my hopes on the Packers to set things right in the football world. After the spanking the Pack handed out last week, I expected #25 to run for at least 150 yards. But alas, no running game yesterday!! Instead, we have the lowly New York Giants going to the Super Bowl.

Two of the Packers Superstars!!

I guess we have to give them credit for beating what most agree are the two best teams in the NFC. But lets face it. Eli Manning beating those two teams is just plain weird. But, you have to give the guy credit. He overcame alot of adversity and gayness to get where he is at. I guess some credit needs to go to the coordinators for the Giants. They had great game plans both weeks.

The Giants win-streak is weirder than a one-eyed cat

What we need to know, is who will be the next star quarterback to tear up the NFL? There are several who come to mind. I think Rhett Bomar, pictured below in his OU uniform, has a great chance to be the next star. Can he recover from the negative publicity from the scandal? It will be interesting to see who the next Tom Brady will be.

Will this be the next great NFL quarterback?

So for now, football season comes to a close. Feb 3rd will be here too soon, I will be another year older, and the cycle of life continues. Someday, maybe I will stop having my emotions so supercharged by football. God forbid I should be so passionate about starving kids, or church, or some other very worthy cause. Until then, Sic'em Bears!

How I became "Poopsandwich"

2008-01-10T00:04:00.000-06:00

"That Poopsandwich name, thats a little much, aint it boy?"

" I cannot beleive you would select such a disgusting name to be called!"

Well, as is the case so many times, that name has its root in my kids.

To say that a road trip with the entire family is chaos, makes chaos look weak. Its a non-stop barrage of "i'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I need to tinkle," and "(you insert your own whiney turd comment here.)"

Somewhere between Waco and Hillsboro, after 30 straight minutes of whining about stopping at "Lone Star Cafe" in Hillsboro, and then the subsequent denial of such, it became too much.

My next to youngest, G for short, has the temperament of a boxer. She is friendly and basically sweet, but if you poke her with a stick, you will regret it very soon after. After the non-stop at Lone Star Cafe, she demanded a sandwich. At which point, I told her, "well how about a poopsandwich?" "Cause you can poop in one hand, and whine about a sandwich in the other, and see which one gets full faster!" (Good Lord people! Its an hour and 45 minutes to Waco! You are not going to starve!)

G if she was a guy

At the moment I issued the "poopsandwich" comment, the entire car erupted in laughter, well the entire care except me. I was still steaming. Oops, bad choice of words.

So to this day, the word poopsandwich is thrown around in various circumstances, usually followed by big belly laughs. The crazy dad makes another memory. So I thought why not...

I just love internet anonymity ;>)

Pregnancy anyone? How about a Vasectomy?

2008-01-07T13:16:00.000-06:00

While reading a blog recently I was reminded of the fear I felt after my wife alerted me to our most recent pregnancy.

My wife is a hotty. Plain and simple. At over 40, she looks better than most women half her age. So its no big surprise that I just can't keep my hands off her. Its been that way most of our marriage.

My Hot Wife - OK, she just looks like Gena Lee

Me and the wife shortly before conception of our last child

But I digress. After she announced the pregnancy of our last child, I fell into a horrible depression. Grad school, meager finances, my surviving on 4-5 hours of sleep each night due to working full time and attending school full time. It just hit me. The next day, after I sobered up, I called a urologist and made an appointment.

He insisted on a "consultation" appointment first. So we could weigh the consequences of permanently damaging the pipes. I insisted that 7 kids was plenty, and that I was looking forward to shooting blanks. That in fact we had agreed to take the wheels off the baby carriage.

So it was, I should come in the next day for the procedure.

Having been in on all the births of my kids, and cutting the cord no less than 4 times, I felt it my god given right (and because i just like to mess with people) to guilt my bride into going into "the room" with me to have the procedure done. It was my finest work, and she was mortified. Although I rejoiced in my work, it would come back to haunt me.

When we arrived the next day, it was the Friday before the Cowboys' Super Bowl (not sure which one). I had been a good patient and taken my pills the doctor had given me to relax. I was majorly stoned. There is just no other way to put it. Having avoided pretty much all drugs for a very long time, these worked thier majic. Not being one to waste a good buzz, I located a ZZ Top CD and my personal CD player and rocked out all the way to the doc's office.

The nurses outfits that dreadful day

To celebrate the Cowboys good fortune, the nurses all wore Cowboys T-shirts and it appeared had gone to someplace that paints blue jeans on you. They were the tightest jeans ever, and left little to the imagination. The prospect of having a hot nurse in skin tight jeans wash Mr Winkie was not an altogether unpleasant thought. I had been married for a very long time, and Mr Winkie had been a one woman Winkie for a very long time. The thought of having another woman touch Mr. Winkie made me dizzy.

Me on the operating table

Well, this is where the tail goes bad, very bad actually.

As it turns out, I was not the only one who had noticed how hot the nurses were in that office. After we had arrived in the operating room, the hottest of the nurses came in to "prep" me for surgery. At this point the wife speaks up and asks the nurse, "you aren't going to wash him? are you?" WHAT?!?!?!? SHUT YOUR BIG MOUTH UP?!?!!?! I thought silently to myself. My Christian sensabilities prevent me from ever cheating on my wife, so my only chance to be touched just vanished before me.

"Well, I was GOING TO" the nurse replied. She left the room and returned with a very annoyed doctor. Apparently, he likes to cut on guys weiners, but prefers not to wash them. He began the wash with a pissed off look at me, right in the eye. He then turned his attention to Mr. Winkie, who had gone from a state just south of excitement, to "cave dweller." He washed my scrotum with such force and verocity (yes, it fits) that I felt compelled to say something, even in my very stoned state.

You know how you tend to talk really loud when you have headphones on?, well I yelled out, "I usually like to wash down there, but I tend to not be that vigorous about it!" I looked up again, to see my wife with her head in her hands, and she appeared to be very white, like she might vomit at any moment. The nurse was bent over the counter laughing uncontrollably. The doctor paused to giggle for a moment, then resumed his torture, but only for a brief moment. At last I was "clean." My nads were already hurting at this point, and nothing had even been cut.

So the surgery begins with a syringe of topical pain killer. He dripped it on my scrotum, and it ran into/onto my rectum. At this point, I felt compelled (I just could not stop talking) to yell, in my best headphones on voice, "AAAUUUGGGGG, my ass is burning!!!" More laughter from the nurse.

Well, the burning didn't last long, and after a few snips, a slight tugging sensation a couple of times, and the smell of burning flesh (since we were sure, we had him coterize the tubes) we were done. The nurse had to help me put my clothes back on because wifey still had her head buried in her hands. She walked me to the front desk, and we were on our way.

My wife taking me home after surgery

I spent the remainder of that day, and half of the next day sitting on bags of ice and popping my pain pills from the good doc. I watched 4 movies, and when I later watched them again, I did not remember seeing them that weekend.

It was a good move and I am glad I did it. It was very liberating.

OK, now you have heard one of my favorite stories.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2008-01-02T09:18:00.000-06:00

Its unlikely anyone noticed that I have been on hiatus since before Christmas, but I just wanted to say Happy New Year and a belated Merry Christmas.

The holidays are a fun time to many, and a giant whip to others. I always try to spend extra time with the kids for fun and memories, while others prefer dragging thier kids around behind a truck which usually never works out.

My girls

Me Modeling my new Christmas Outfit

May this coming year be your most prosperous ever, and may your new clothes fit as good as mine do.

A lovely way to show how classy you are

2007-12-17T20:46:00.001-06:00

The "Trampstamp"

For the last 5-8 years girls everywhere have been showing people how classy and cool they are by getting lower back tattoos.

They range from the tiny to the large, from the cute to the obscene. But one thing is for sure, if they have one, they usually want everyone to see it. And there are websites devoted to the "Trampstamp."

Could this be on a Baylor Beauty?

But let me warn you, you just can't "unsee" these things once they have been unleashed on you. Skidmarks? Must be a baseball player...

In case you are not convinced that the trampstamp is here to stay (no really, tattoos are forever) you can even see them on dolls!

Ken: "That Barbie is such a ho"

The Cute?

Danger! Danger! (She may have something you don't want)

Its amazing how people view the women who show these off. The term "Trampstamp" pretty much sums up the general view of single guys who spot a girl with one. Its generally viewed that any girl with one issues a "free pass" to any guy who "wants some."

The Elaborate

Saturday Night Live even addressed the phenomenon with one of their patented fake commercials. "Next to smoking and having sex, getting a lower back tattoo is the next best way for a young girl to be cool!" See this really funny video by clicking HERE. Too bad its not that easy to get rid of one.

Even Guys are doing it? Thanks for ruining it for me jerk!

OK, all better now!

BASEBALL, BEEN BERRY, BERRY GOOD TO THEM...

2007-12-13T20:44:00.000-06:00

Well, I guess we all secretly knew, but its dissapointing still. Many of our heroes were busted today by the Mitchell report. It turns out our superstars were geting juiced as early as a decade ago, and likely before that.

Pettite was a surprise, but Clemens was not. TU has been running out criminals for years.

Hey dude, have you seen my car?

As a baseball fan it is majorly dissapointing to know that some my favorite players are mentioned in that report. Pettite, Miguel Tejada, Gary Sheffield (who has maintained that he did not use steriods) are among around 50 players the report names. As a baseball purist, it bothers me to know that the stars may be stars because of the substances they took.

Young Barry, undefiled

I know the arguments, Bonds would still be a homerun hitter, because steriods don't affect hand-eye coordination. I agree with that. Where I have the problem, is that with steriods, a routine warning track fly ball becomes a home run. And in Bonds' case, lots of them.

I hate to say it, but I hope they get punished.

Colorado Church Shootings-HEAVY, NO COMEDY HERE

2007-12-10T22:29:00.000-06:00

Someone is praying for You...

One of those weird unexpected things happened again. My sister-in-law lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado where they had two seperate incidents of shootings at churches. They locked down all the churches in the area for safety reasons. Now, several innocent people are dead, and for no good reason. They are not martyrs, they were not killed for standing up for thier faith. They are dead because some kid could not handle life.

It turns out the turd who did the shootings was kicked out of the dorm where he did his first shooting. He was raised in a deeply religous home, by good, God-fearing parents. Yet somehow, he flipped out. This has been a mystery to me: how people flip out when they have good parents and a seemingly good life. I guess the pressure to not fail got to him?

I know the arguments: video games and music videos desensitize them to violence; they have anger issues. But in my mind I think I have a partial answer. I wonder if these kids have ever come to grips with the reality that they are responsible for thier actions, and if they understand the consequences of thier actions?

One of the greatest gifts my parents ever gave me, was a dose of reality. My mom would say, "this is what will happend if you choose this action, and this will happen if you choose that action." Then she would tell me which was better and why, and then allow me to make the decision. Like when they told me that if I was caught drinking, I would lose my car for a month. Then when I came home stumbling drunk one night, and lost my car for a month. I remember it well. My junior year of high school: vice-president of the junior class, baseball team, one act play. Boy was I the busy popular kid! So you can imagine my consternation when I had to beg for rides to and from practice. How embarassing! (Yes, I was that shallow)

Then, another time my dad bought me a new camaro. I was in heaven. My dad simply told me, "you wreck it, and its gone." Well, I wrecked it, and it was gone before I got out of bed the next morning. They were just two of many tough love lessons, and I learned them well. It caused me to realize that every action had a result. And that I needed to weigh my actions, to avoid undesired results.

Its a tough thing for a parent to do: to provide the opportunity for a child to fail. And although they were serious issues for me personally, in the grand scheme of things they were really pretty minor. But they conveyed the greater lesson.

Tonight, I say a prayer for the families of the victims of the Colorado shootings. Please say one of your own. Those families will be forever affected because of the selfishness of one boy. The parents of those two sisters who were 16 and 18 will live different lives because thier sweet girls are gone forever from this earth. Comfort will be hard to find for that mom and dad.

It comforting for me to know, that Jesus was also "a man of sorrows." I pray they find thier comfort. Its good to know that they will see their girls in the sweet bye and bye. But its much harder to be comforted here on this earth, when those we have given our lives for are gone. I pray the peace of God comforts thier pain.

UT & ATM Cooperate on New Facilities

2007-12-07T14:28:00.001-06:00

Local news reports that ATM football players Yemi Babalola and Brandon Joiner were arrested on Thursday after both were charged with aggravated robbery and drug possession. It seems they entered a local apartment and bound the victims with duct tape (restraint of choice for Land Thieves everywhere).

The pair will miss the team's game in the Alamo Bowl, to which Joiner, from Killeen, TX, allegedly replied "Thank God, San Antonio is a toilet."

The Home of one of San Antonio's wealthiest residents

In the aftermath of the arrests, there has been ground breaking cooperation between ATM and UT. Coach Mack Brown has released plans for the new Travis County "Jail / Dormatory" now under construction adjacent to Memorial Stadium in Austin to new ATM head coach Mike Sherman. According to Mack, "I just wanted to extend an olive branch to Mike Sherman and try to be an example of interagency cooperation." He has not been in the college game for a long time, and may not know he can have a "dormatory" for his problem players. By building it adjacent to the stadium he can utilize the 4 free hours the prisoners, I mean the players receive each day."

This move by Mack touched off a revolt in nature. (Everyone knows you can't do nice things for an aggie.) There suddenly arose a deafening roar near college station, and a large F-5 tornado touched down in College Station knocking over 2,000 mobile homes. No aggies were injured, as they were in the barn with thier sheep at the time.

"This is a one time deal says Mack. I have recently been privately supporting the Baylor Bears. I just loved that frickin' Miracle on the Brazos!"

"Sic'em Bears" says Mack

SI's Sportsman or Sportsthings(?) of the Year

2007-12-04T12:31:00.000-06:00

While surfing the Land Thieves website yesterday, I stumbled upon a section, much like the one to your right, that contained links to websites the author likes to visit. One of those sites is Sports Pickle. They are a satire website, much like Bearmeat or Land Thieves. I have been a fan of Mad Magazine since I was a child. Satire just fits my personality I guess, and I still love it today. So many of the sites I visit are satirical in nature.

But on this day, my sports mind was pointed to a particular story on Sports Pickle that I was thrilled to hear. Beyonce is one of my favorite entertainers. She is a stunning beauty, and quite frankly, I am certain the song Brick House was written about her. (He went forward in time, OK?)

So the story indicates that this year SI announced that the breasts of all thier swimsuit models would be the, and I quote, "Sportsthings of the Year." This is exciting news, in more ways than one, and I was glad to see Beyonce get her deserved recognition, and lets face it, breasts deserve more attention.

You can only imagine my confusion when driving to work this morning I heard on the radio that Brett Favre was named Sportsman of the Year. What the hell?

Now I love Brett Favre and the Packers. And lets face the hard truth here, Donald Driver is the most underrated receiver in the NFL, but come on, Beyonce deserved this one.

Beauty and the Geek - my own story

2007-12-02T22:06:00.000-06:00

It funny how we can get sucked into a TV show. I spent almost all day Sunday (until 8pm) watching the Beauty and the Geek marathon. The final episode airs Tuesday, and I just may have to watch it. I think its on MTV if you are interested.

Watching the show today made me think of how we process sterotypes. The "beauties" immediately looked down on the "geeks" who they knew nothing about. In return, the geeks felt they were intellectually superior. If you have watched the show you know what happens: geek learns the beauty is pretty on the inside too (most of the time); beauty finds out that the geek really does have alot to offer.

But this is what happens in life. We shut out those who are different than us, mostly to avoid being rejected and then hurt. In reality, we are basically the same. We all want to be loved and accepted. We want to have friends and feel we are important in this life.

I have been on both sides of this dilemma. I have been the skinny kid that got made fun of. And I have been the popular kid that all the girls wanted to go out with. But thats a story for another day.

I remember wanting to be friends with the lovely Cheryl D. in the first grade. I was in love with her, and was fairly sure she was the most beautiful first grader on earth. I never went through that "I hate girls" phase. When she would not return my affections, I tackled her and kissed her right on the mouth, her kicking and screaming all the while. They immediately sent me to the principal's office, where he did his best to refrain from laughing. If that happened today, I would be in alternative school.

Some other time, I will tell you the story of the turkeys and the eagle. But I will tell you the moral of that story: when those who should accept you do not accept you, you will be accepted by whoever will.

Any memories you would like to share?

T-Shirt Sales by my church

2007-11-30T15:28:00.000-06:00

My church is selling T-shirts in order to provide clean water to an African village. View the link to video done by Channel 8 news here:

http://www.wfaa.com/video/index.html?nvid=196791&she=1

If you want to buy one, go here:

http://www.givedifferent.org/

Live like a rock star

2007-11-30T00:47:00.000-06:00

Well I just got back from the Cowboy / Packers game. What a great game! It was as everyone expected. Brett Favre has nerve damage in his arm, and was knocked out of the game.

It was shocking to see how many Packers fans were at the game. I am guessing around one third or more of all attending were Packers fans.

But the real treat for my son, poop jr, was that we got to meet several of the players after the game. In my work, I come into contact with pro football players, and after the game we were allowed into the VIP area and had nice visits with Marion Barber, Bradie James, and at least 6 other Cowboys. Also got to meet Tommy from the Martin show, what a really nice guy he is.

Poop jr was pretty blown away. He was shocked old dad got to live like a rock star. "You got cool friends dad!"

http://i231.photobucket.com/albums/ee29/deemus99/DSCN1921.jpg

What have you done that surprised and impressed your kids?

The Loss of Bearmeat

2007-11-29T11:20:00.000-06:00

This last week, my second favorite website appears to have reached its end. For some time now, I have been going to the BearMeat blog to read about goings on with my favorite college, Baylor University.

On November 20, President Red Andrews signed off for what appears to be the last time. Leaving hordes (or at least 17) people wondering how to get thier fix. It is for this that I will long each day.

Then yesterday, the blog title went to "Thee University has quited us" in the title. This sounds bad, very bad.

What will we do now that BearMeat appears to have met its end?

For those unfortunate enough to have never perused BearMeat, here you go:

http://bearmeat.blogspot.com/