Monday, August 11, 2008

Sheriff's Department Cannot Operate a Fax Machine





Seal of Brazoria County, "Where Texas Began"
This is a true story. None of the facts have been changed, because of the stupity of the situation.
Recently while on vacation, I was ticketed for no insurance. It was in a car I rarely drive, and the ticket was promptly placed into the glove box and forgotten. Until this weekend.
I received a call from the Brazoria County Sherrif's office informing me of a warrant for my arrest for non-payment of the ticket. As it turns out, I just needed to show them my insurance card, which was not in the car, because I only drive that 4-wheel drive to the coast. Which also explains why I never saw it again. It hasn't moved since we returned from the coast.
So this morning, I attempted to fax my insurance card to the Sherriff's Department to resolve the issue. I faxed it and called. Not there. An hour later, i faxed it again. Not there.
At the risk of sounding like an ass, I requested that the clerk verify the fax machine had paper in it. It did. However, the toner cartridge is out. She didn't know how to change it, and even she did, she didn't know where they were kept. No shitting.
Our resolution, tomorrow, the "city lady" will be in (she only works a half day, no shitting) and she know how to change the toner cartridge. She will then print the fax, adjust the ticket, and see if I owe anything at that point. In the meantime, I should "try to not get stopped" or I might go to jail.
No shitting.




Two of Brazoria County's Finest, not the one who gave me the ticket

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Chinese People Eat Weird Stuff

This is what a chinese person looks like






This guy has a strange new diet. I have heard of strange things being eaten by chinese people: rats, dogs and other things. But a canadian? WTH?

Monday, August 4, 2008

Morgan Freeman in Serious Car Accident


The Great Morgan Freeman


So Morgan Freeman was involved in a serious car accident this weekend. At the time of this writing he is in serious condition in the hospital.

This academy award winning actor has been a favorite of mine for many years. His fine work includes: Million Dollar Baby, Seven, Driving Miss Daisy, The Bucket List, Bruce Almighty, Evan Almighty, Amistad, Nurse Betty and tons more movies. Not the least of which was his role as the narrator of the wildly popular film, March of the Penguins.

This blog wishes Mr. Freeman Godspeed in his recovery.

This blog also wants to know, "what the hell you doin' driving a 1997 Maxima?"

Well?